The Story of Lovino Vargas the Wizard And His Vampire Assistant Alfred
by OlliD
Summary: Romerica AU Lovino is the outsider of the Vargas wizard family. He and his best friend Arthur are forced to choose sides in a conflict between the rulers of the magic realm. Enter Alfred a vampire who let just say has a lot issues. What happens when you put them together? One hell of a romance between a wizard and a vamp. What could possibly go wrong? Yaoi don't like don't read
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys, so i guess you can say I'm back from the dead not mention I'm on total sugar rush mode right now. Oh yeah and I changed my pen name since Atari is broken it's just really depressing. I decided to put A Call to Arms on hiatus for a little while until I get some motivation to write again. As you can see I decide to write an AU magic fic where the super awesome Lovi is the main character I guess. Idk the idea's been kind of stuck in my head for like weeks! Anyways ( insert awesome Prussia emoticon ) on to the story!

Disclaimer: If owned Hetalia there would only be pasta not war.

Oh yeah and the chapter song for this is: The City by The 1975

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Chapter 1: Counting Cards Was The Best Job He Ever Had

I sat inside Julius's study surrounded by mountains of different ancient spell books and scrolls. Ever since this stupid war started he had begun to make me study more advanced spells and incantations in case of an attack. Now I spend all my fucking time inside of this stupid, dusty library with only my smartass cat guardian to keep me company.

"Gah! I can't fucking take it anymore!" I shouted as I stormed out of the room old room. While I was walking away the bane of my existence decided to appear on my shoulder.

"Wow didn't expect you to go over the deep end so soon." She said while she yawned "Now what's your problem, dumbass?"

I grabbed her by the scruff of her neck "Don't you have to some other wizard to annoy, Romana? Better yet where is yoour boyfriend, Fernando?"

Her yellow eyes narrowed "Of course not my only wish is to serve you, Lovi." She replied sarcastically before vanishing again and reappearing on the floor beside me "Besides, Fernando is out of town with Antonio on some kind of tour or some shit and what kind of guardian would I be if I wasn't around to help _my master_? Now back to my original question: Where the hell are you going? "I rolled my eyes at the question and kept walking "Fine but when Julius finds out you're gone I won't be able to save you."

"You see idiot he won't find out because you are going to become me." Before Romana could object with a wave of my finger and a puff of smoke she became an exact copy of me, with every detail down to my curl in the right place. She looked in the mirror then turned back to me fuming "You bastard! What the fuck?! Who gave you permission to turn me into _your ugly ass_?!" She screamed before attempting to scratch me only to miss me.

"It's only temporary besides you are supposed to help and protect me or do we need to let the big guy know about this." Her err… my face paled at the thought "Okay you win Lovino but you owe me big time, you dick. Oh yeah and if Julius finds out you're taking the fucking fall."

"Whatever just hurry up get back to the study and act like me." She nodded and mumbled something along the lines of "Feliciano would never make me do something like this…" as she walked back down the hall. I groaned inwardly at the mention of my baby brother. Don't get me wrong I love my fratello but ever since we were kids he always was everybody's favorite. People called him some sort of prodigy since he finished his magical training at a young age (how that happened I don't know, the guy had a totally toad's brain.) Even our nonno paid more attention to him since he had at least one heir to carry on his magical legacy after Uncle Julius decided not to. You see our family is basically considered to be world class witches and wizards with me being the only late bloomer. I had basically resigned to my fate as the "other Vargas boy".

Once I was outside I pulled my pocket watch out and set it to contact Arthur, my best friend ever since we were kids, he was the son of an elven wand maker and helped out around their shop. He also was an outcast like me because his mother was a human. It took a while for him to finally answer his watch but when he did he looked pretty agitated. With closer inspection I could see that the shop was in complete disarray with brooms and wands all over the place "Whoa what the hell happened to you bushy brows?" I say jokingly but I could tell he wasn't amused "Father decided to let me look after the shop but some of the brooms weren't too happy with that." He said before casting a dispersal spell and making the room suddenly get quiet "_Purifico_!" The brooms suddenly went to cleaning and fixing the room back to its original state. He came back to the watch "Sorry Lovino now what was it that you wanted?"

"I was calling to see if you want to hang out tonight." I say as his expression lightened up "Fine I have to lock the shop up before I can meet up with you. Anywhere you want to go in particular?" A smirk flashed across my face "We're going to the human world buddy. Three words: _**New Fucking York**_." He looked a little apprehensive but ultimately agreed "Okay but no magic this time." I sighed "Fine just hurry up and get your ass over here and meet me at the Canterbury Road portal." With that I closed my watch and headed over to Canterbury's portal. I chanted the "_transfiguro_" spell and my clothes transformed from those stupid robes I had on to a pair of black skinny jeans, a white band t-shirt with a vest, a black fedora and black converse. Since I was walking past the mirror shop I took a few seconds to admire myself in the window until the shop owner chased me off.

When I got to the road Arthur was waiting there impatiently with the portal making the same weird noises it usually did. He turned around and was wearing a red t-shirt saying "Fuck off" on it and a pair of ripped skinny jeans. When we snuck into the human world Arthur always had to make a fashion statement, this time he went so far as to wear his earrings, fingerless gloves, and old converse. He even used some kind of transfiguration spell to hide his slightly pointed ears. I gave him a tap on the shoulder making him jump a little "Wow you go all out every time you get a chance eh Artie." To that he flipped me the bird before pulling out his watch "Let's go wanker before Julius comes back and has your head on a stake."

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"Don't worry about it, Romana has got me covered. I transformed her into a clone version of me so he won't suspect a thing." I say as I move towards the portal entrance "Now are you coming or what? We're kind of running on borrowed time." Arthur gives me a look of suspicion before stepping through the portal. I followed suit soon after making the portal close behind us. When we stepped out on the other side we found ourselves in the men's bathroom of some nightclub near Manhattan. I look over my shoulder to see Arthur already leaving to head for the bar or dance floor.

When we walked out I expected to see a booming nightclub, with an awesome D.J and some nice tunes, but instead we were greeted with a half empty lounge and a fake ass magician on stage, who was looking for his for his next "volunteer". It's assholes like him who have made wizards a fucking laughing stock to humans. I opened my mouth to call the man any name I could come up with but Arthur's hand on my shoulder turned me against it and led me to the bar. We sat down for a few minutes before the bartender came out.

"What will it be boys?" The middle aged man said when he finally came back to the bar with some glasses.

"Give me a glass of rum." I say as the man looks at me funny.

The man looked over to Arthur "And for you, lad?"

"Just a glass of brandy for me." He says coolly before turning around to watch the show until the man comes back with our drinks. We down the first drinks quickly and in no time we were on our eighth round and I was piss drunk.

By the time he gets back I notice him looking at us even more strangely "Say, aren't you a little young to be drinking rum?" He says as he hands us the glasses. I look him dead in the eye and reply back with a little bit of venom in my voice "Aren't you a little old to be wearing braces?" The man's face drained of all color and he ran off into the back storage room.

The rest of the night was a blur; all I can remember was leaving the lounge, heading to a large specially designed young adult night club, getting I guess more drunk, punching the bastard who tried to dry hump me, and flirting with a handsome stranger with a couple of pieces missing here and there. Unfortunately I managed to get separated from Arthur in the process. Then I finally blacked out after supposedly returning to Julius's house.

The next morning I woke up with a killer headache in bed and a bad pain near upper back. 'What the fuck happened last night' I think to myself as I take in my surroundings but upon further inspection I realized I wasn't in my room. The bedroom was filled with various posters and sneakers of all kind lined the room. I panicked when I noticed my pants and shirt on the floor praying to the gods that I hadn't done something stupid last night.

Suddenly a voice brought me back down to earth "Hey, good to see you're up dude."

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So...This was probably a total fail but it isn't going to be as depressing as ACTA and it's going to be more romantic with Romerica as the dominant pairing. I guess that's it for this author's note so leave me with a review to let me know what you think with some constructive criticism. Oh yeah don't forget to subscribe if you like it. Until the next time OlliD over and out!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N; Yay I finally got the chapter uploaded after trying like six times but it doesn't really matter now. Anyways without further ado on to the next chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia because if I did FrUK and Spamano would be everywhere.

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Chapter 2: Negative Thinking

I sat there in shock at the man standing in front of me. He had blond hair and a stupid grin was plastered on his face that I may or may not have found attractive. His skin was slightly pale and he had a very strange tattoo but the most peculiar things about him were his icy blue eyes and his slightly elongated canine teeth. I continued to stare at him until he finally spoke "Dude you can really drink someone under the table! But then again that's what I should expect from a Vargas wizard."

That's when things got really weird. I continued looking at him before catching him off guard and knocking him to the ground "What the hell dude?" He says before managing to land a punch to my cheek. We continued to scuffle like that for a few minutes until I had him pinned to the ground while he squirmed a little underneath me "Who the fuck are you, bastard?! Where the hell am I?! And where the hell is Arthur?!" I shout as he struggles to get up "Maybe if you would easy up a little, I can tell you." He says before I ease my grip on him, still glaring at the blond haired man.

"Okay fine you win. My name is Alfred F. Jones and we're at my apartment. We came here after you started a fight and got us kicked out of the bar. Then you started making out with me not that I'm complaining or anything…" He stops when he sees the look of horror on my face "Trust me we didn't do anything since you passed out the moment we stepped through the door. Oh yeah so I'm gonna guess that the dude with the caterpillar eyebrows is your friend Arthur. Well he kind of went home with my cousin Francis after they had gotten mega drunk." I let go of him as the event's from last night came rushing back to me. 'So the bastard was telling the truth. I guess I owe him an apology.' I think to myself then give the idea more thought 'Whatever this probably isn't the first time he's had his ass kicked. Besides now I've got to worry about the fact that Arthur's definitely gonna kick my ass…if Julius doesn't beat him to it'.

"Um would you mind getting off of me, I kind of can't breathe." Alfred said as he reached for his glasses somehow managing to effortlessly knock me off of him. I didn't plan on letting him get away that easily until I got all of my answers "Mind explaining how you figured out I was a wizard, fang boy?" He smirked and casually shrugged disappearing and reappearing behind me "Well for one thing it's not every day you meet someone with such a peculiar scent. Not to mention you have a tattoo on your back saying "_Vrenerficusi"_ which I believe roughly translates to bloodline of a magic." I stood there frozen in shock since I didn't know whether or not he was gonna kill me "I'm shocked you caught on so fast to the whole vampire thing, most people don't realize it until after I start drinking their blood."

"Hmph smart vampire." I say as he gives a smug smirk "Please tell me you don't sparkle and all that shit." I mentally grimaced at the thought causing Alfred to chuckle loudly "You know you're pretty funny for a wizard. I thought you guys were a bunch of stiffs besides that stuff about us sparkling is made up and fake as hell."

'Well now this makes it even more awkward. I'm stuck in a room with a vampire who can kill me at any minute but it still beats being stuck in that stupid library all day.' I think to myself while carefully maneuvering towards the door "Wait a sec; you can't really be planning on going outside like that. It's freezing out there. You can borrow my brother's clothes if you want to. Then I can take you to meet up with your friend Arthur." Seeing as to the fact that our nonno taught us to be respectful to our hosts and the fact that my powers didn't work in the human world, I had no choice but to accept his offer. Big mistake on my part.

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_**Twenty Minutes Later and an Alka-Seltzer Later...**_

I stood in the in the hallway mirror looking at my so called attire. It was made up of a white hoodie with a giant maple leaf on it and some jeans "Ha you look pretty cool like that, dude." Alfred says once we had left his apartment. I groan "My name is Romano Lovino Vargas; you can either call me Romano or Lovino just not 'dude'." Alfred doesn't speak for a few seconds before bursting out with "I'll just call you Lovi or something." I stop myself from smacking him as hard as possibly which took a great amount of self control while he kept rambling on about some shit. This continued on for about ten minutes before I got fed up with it "Hey bastardo can you shut the fuck up! Gods do you ever shut up!" I shout at him not noticing the look of hurt that appeared on his face.

"Well um I just thought that maybe you would help me out with my problem since you are a really powerful wizard." I looked at him dumbfounded by his words before lightening my expression "I'm sorry but you're probably looking for my brother Feliciano. I can't even cast a proper fire spell without getting singed. 'Sides how come you can't do it?" I ask averting his gaze the whole time "Well since you're the only one who can do it." He says sincerely causing me to look up "And you would be able to profit from it to."

"Fine I'll help you but-" I was cut off by his excited shout and his cheerful jumping until I grab him by the collar causing him to calm down "Look calm down before somebody calls the cops and tell me what you need me to do." He fixes his glasses before freeing himself from my grip "Well I um how can I put this without sounding like a crazy idiot." My patience was running thin "Out with it, Jones!" He sighed "Okay Iumkindofwantyouturnmebackin toahuman." He whispers in a rapid fire sentence.

"Hey bastard can you repeat that?" I say growing increasing irritated at how he was beating around the bush "Okay, I want you to help me turn back into a human." He attempts to say but it only made me angry "What the hell, Jones?! You actually had me going for a second there, now what is your real question."

He looked confused before realization struck his face "Wait a sec, I'm not lying I really want you to help me. I can't be a hero when I'm a monster too." The look of seriousness on his face proved he was serious about his request "Please I'm not one to beg but this life wasn't one I had chosen." Now he looked kind of pitiful with his blue eyes pleading in a softened gaze.

It was my turn to sigh, knowing what I was about to say next would probably end very badly "Okay I'll think about it but no promises." He scooped me in a suffocating bear hug nearly crushing my lungs in the process. When he finally let go it took a few seconds for me to finally regain my breath "I said…no promises…." I manage to get out. My face turned red from embarrassment "Sorry about that, I guess even heroes can get carried away. I guess we should go meet Francis and eyebrows. Hey Lovino you're really funny when you get all red." Alfred says as we continue walking up the street.

"Shut up bastard." I say feeling my face heat up even more. Alfred pays no attention to my insult and continues walking, thus effectively beginning our journey together (actually it's more like a weird ass death trip but you know it still has the same meaning). Only one thing ran through my mind as we walked through the crowded street: 'When did I get a tattoo?'

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A/N; I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter even though its a totally fail. Parts of the wizard language is based off of latin and other real languages and the other part is completely made up just to avoid any confusion later on. So as usual leave me a review or PM me what you think of the story so far. Constructive criticism is always appreciated. So yeah see you guys next time, OlliD over and out!


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